12 Jul 09Today I went to a friend's birthday party. It was nice to spend part of the day with Ina and AJ. Then I went for a long walk. I stopped over at Andrew's. We ended up having dinner. He is leaving tomorrow for the Carolinas.  He has been such a support for me during this process. I know that I will be in touch with him, but it will not be the same as if he was in the city. Maybe it's time to reach out to my other friends for support right now. It's hard to ask for help. Today the food was OK. I hope that you had a nice weekend. 13 Jul 09 Today I had one of my morning workouts with Billy. I am still dealing with some back pain, but was able to do some stretches beforehand, which helped relieve some of it. The workout went well, and I did some things I thought I could never do. I still have problems with doing squats, but I know in time I will improve. Billy suggested that I walk home from the gym, since it was a beautiful day. So I took my time, meandering through SOMA until got home. I had some lunch, and I forwarded to you today a copy of the email I sent to my friend Jo-Ellen. Hopefully you received her response. I hope that she is able to help you in some way. Then I went to my therapist appointment. After coming home, I had some dinner. I knew beforehand that there would be cake at tonight's bridge lesson, it was our graduation from Easy Bridge 1! So I was ready to have some, but I had some on Sunday since it was my friend AJ's birthday, and he made the cake! Instead, when I got to Bridge tonight, I had purchased a soda. The cake was in the other room, and I saw it, but chose not to have a slice. Tonight the game was much different than last week. I played with Loren, a very handsome man who is a good player. I would apologize for my bad bidding, but he was very patient and we did end up doing well on a couple of the hands. I'll probably check the results in the morning, just like I did last week. I want so badly to be a good bridge player. A new set of classes begin next Monday, and I am hopeful that I can learn more about a very complex yet very addicting pastime. Have a great week! 14 Jul 09: I did my workout with Billy today. He still wants me to not use the heart monitor during our workouts. The workout was great. I was sore all day. We boxed, which I thought I could never do, ever. He gave me some homework. (see 15 Jul 09 below)Then I walked home from the gym.  I stayed up way too late. Food went OK today. 15 Jul 09: Today was a busy day. Even though I got to bed late, I was able to be up and out of the house to meet with Jo-Ellen and the Cantor to plan and discuss the service we will be leading during the High Holy Days. It was nice to see the Cantor, as she has been sick and will be away for a few weeks in Israel. Then Jo-Ellen and I talked more about the service, and I expressed to her what I would like to see be in the service. I left the synagogue to do my homework for Billy, climbing the Filbert Street Steps. I had not done that since I moved to San Francisco in 1980, I walked from Market and Drumm (the Hyatt Regency Hotel)to the Gateway Safeway on Jackson, then walked to Filbert Street via Battery. As I approached the stairs, I looked at them and thought to myself, "OK, I've done the stairs in my building, I can do this  one step at a time."As I walked up this set of stairs, I would take a break and enjoy the gardens and wondered how people get refrigerators to their homes. It was perfect weather to do this assignment. I went up to Coit Tower and said hello to Christopher Columbus (his statue is there in the  parking lot)then went down the Greenwich Street stairs, back down to Battery Street. I was going to cheer that I had done it, but there was this couple walking towards me, and did not want to make a scene. (But I was glad I did it)Then I walked over to Pier 27 to go aboard the Cuahatemoc, the Mexican Navy's tall ship. I have never been on a tall ship. Boy, was it cool. The ship was on a tour of the Pacific, and offered free tours until they depart on Saturday. I then took the F Line to the Starbucks at Church and Market to meet my friend Chris. Came home, and realized that I had not sent you my reports. One more thing: I want to cross the 100 pound point. I have to be gentle with myself. This is not about the number. I just have to remember to keep my eye on the ball. I don't want to be stuck. Just thought I would share that with you. I hope that you are having a great week. 16 Jul 09 Today I ended up getting out of bed around noon, till dealing with the back pain. Then I had breakfast and headed over to the gym for my workout with Billy. He was trying to show me how to do this exercise and I kept apologizing. I just felt uncoordinated today. He had me throw the medicine ball against the wall and even that was a struggle. I am still sore from our workout on Tuesday, and I had a hard time with the pull ups I was doing on the machine. Some days when I am in there I think I will never lose my big gut and that no one will be attracted to me. I came home and was expecting a package from a book seller in the east coast but it did not come today. I am afraid that the item is lost. I was looking forward to reading the book once I got it. Hopefully it will come tomorrow. I emailed my friend Avi last night, and I have not heard from him. I guess he is busy. I reached out to someone last night at the AA meeting, and asked him if I could talk to him. He didn't call me back either. I hate that. I'm going to try and see the matinee of Star Trek in the Castro this weekend. It will give me some time to get out of myself and my apartment. I pray that these feeling pass quickly since they have stuck around my head for way too long. 18 Jul 09 I'm up again way too late, and almost forgot to email you. I did get out of the house today. I went to the store and the library, then I came home and fixed dinner. I was able to talk to Avi this evening. He helped me put some things into perspective and he gave me a list of things to get started on. I'm planning to go to the movies tomorrow. It will be nice to get out of the house again. I seem to be eating a lot of carbs right now. I don't think I'm in trouble, but I saw tonight how I went over my allotment but I did not go over my calorie intake. Something I may need to look at further with you. Emotionally I am doing OK. I think that going to bed soon will help. I hope that you are enjoying your time away.

Author: Kevin Johnson, Commit to Fit winner 2009